anw, i believe that we all tend to hide some part of ourselves to others. sometimes it jus become a natural thing to do.. but i hope that u'll chose not to do that. its like u sound so zi bei in ur blog. either i readin too much into what u say or u r really feelin down. i hope that u wont think so much abt ur probs coz worryin wont help. worryin only make u feel more helpless and upset. and the feelin u gave me is that u xiang tai duo le... ppl may judge u, ppl may say a bad remark about u. but what really matters is what u feel abt yourself. theres no way u can change what others feel abt u but u can definately change what u feel about yourself. theres always 2 choices in life. liking yourself or not. ( maybe its not till the extent) everytime a choice is made, the effects will take place...

im not sayin that u shld maintain a smile on ur face always. its okay to be sad. i wud rather see u sad then fake a smile. however, i hope that u'll stand up again stronger then before after the period of sadness. As said by some person, there's always a time for sth. take setbacks, disappointin stuff as an opportunity to learn. there might be sth God is tryin to tell u. He may not give the reasons for the things he does to u.. but everything is for a purpose. rmb.

well, i dont think im qualified to give u advices, but hope i did kai dao u a bit.. there's always me that can pray for u. i cant help but God can. He can work miracles. all we need is faith. For all things work for the good of those who love him ... takkair my fren!! :D